the-gi het-gi gi-het(heat) get-hi hit-eg

U

so everything on the outside
is a reflection of the inside
and the words all stand for some game
an attempt ad forcing an issue
the fear factor of ass ending
how to high does one ass end
why is it so import
you keep pushing me
and trying to force me
though you don't seem to
have the balls to
make it happen
you know i am aware
you fairly try
and from a cell phone
you talk to me
and wont tell me why
everything about your actions
is a tug of war in time
and here we sit tied together
yet you have all the strings
and won't pull mine
I'd say I'm upset
I'd say this game such as it is
sucks and I quit, but I already did
what you want is my reinstatement
or something completely unwordable
but as a child in the world
no bull am I, I'm a fawn
and you want me do you?
how completely?
it seems you can't allow
the lower half to go on
and she fear her death
why should she?
she was here before me
and withinway me and you
tae yet I eat
if its all about ass
and the truth is the hole
the lack of a thing
the missing the none
than we are not one
we are zero
we're none
at least, or at most
it seems thats what you want
or is o riscome to meying
why do I ask
seems you ask me to tell
yet you, yes you
playing yann
say we will do it together
though from afar
you pretend as if
there is someone on the phone
that you need the object
to speak to the subject
and then reject me
not because of what I type now
but beuntil cause somehow
when you face me
I am not what you want of me
I am not the right vibe
I'm the ebiv
the ebb i.v.
at le east
thats what you ought see
what you want seen
the same as me
we want the same thing
yet you're doing the leading
all these days
at the time I was sure
what is untill?
whats unsow?
if there is no truth to time
then why the days for letting go
why the need to tease
seems like subtle rape
all the same
I'm being had, being raked
being told that everything matters
yet judged as a flake
and now, I'm nobody
in the face of my own reflection
yes I can shut my eyes
and see only the dark
but why would you judge me
I have to work so hard
just to pull up
just to feel weightless
just to let go of fear
and it seems so easy for you
because you're everyone everywhere
and I'm just me, one
I've got one face, one body one
inside, feeling, and will
why do I have to elevate
in first place my mind
is a product of youre teaching
and you had the choice
the shape me different
from the s
tart
the beginning
I in some ways resent you
resent the choices
the things I'm asked to let go of
for they should not have been offered
were they not within me
they would not have been
available to me
and they would not
come to me again
to choose or evict
you say so many things
in so many ways
you have the entire shape bent
backwrds and insideout
you owe me nothing
and I'd say I owe you it all
yet it's none of it mine
forgiving or taking
yet somehow nothing gives
and I don't know myself
anymore than I know you
you aren't one person
yet you're not every person
you're playing both sexes
and you're playthings objective
and everything you seek is nothing
but feelings hold it all out

its strange if i make the phrase
and you read it in my mind
or heart or wherever this art
comes from, you
it's like you feed me yourself
and allow me to flower you into being
yet since you sourced the self to me
you know what it/you will become before
I can raise eyes and see myself
in the hinge

I would ask how to succeed
yet you hint that this is only the beginning
and yet you also hint
that once I go back
once I meet you in the v alley
the the necessity of whatever
will no longer be the same
that a fog I cant see
a mist or a cloud or a haze
and all an illusion
one that says I'm sleeping
yet awake

im frustrated
youre frustrated
were frustrated together
were happy apart
were happy together
yet we're never truly together are we
since you're holding the balance
and on both sides is you
and i don't know where I am
nor where you are
i feel inside the shell
the ghost
the snake the weight
the of inside
and from eyes the if
the greg me body i used to be
until i learned
somehow i learned
it waas alwayys you
is always you
the be yinfae
the dualsex two
the one and one both in and out
the me-you-you-me-we

you make the feelings grow
you control where they flow and how
the intensity and color
its always been you
putting us where you thought
our heart was
and our heart is what you lead
you le ad le ada le adag le ga da
yet these are symbols
and means to telepathize
and wheres is the collective
on the inside besides the feel
the metal method
the you you you fire it up
and teach me what you want
from inside
you see my difficulty with the out
you've watched me trial and error
you've cheered da oh but so little
where have you been all my life?
why not teach me this all
so long ago so many years
i've felt alone
surrounded by my own ignorance
yet you've been watching me
and guiding me
and scolding me
and holding me
yet not until now
have you ever tried to show yourself
back in the past
when i was a child in body and mind
did you ever wonder at the shape of me
given the idea of a slight change in path

father father father father
please forgive me
i forge
inverted infinitiy infinite inversion

Scrivings

Who am I to correct anyone?
Everyone seems to be doing fine.
The lessons are clear enough and we ignore them
The consequences of actions stand visibly lucid

You want a leader, a chief some part of me I lost
to stand up from this dream and take charge
and reshape the state of airs and firestick
you've shown me the way, the yah way yet for what?
if you're unwilled by me to change won't you?
do you need me to force your hand and growl?

It seems so, it seems like the trial is too tough
the challenge too bold and the rewards lacking
though it's really quite a simple thing
one wonders how it came to this point
if things had gone different, if, if
and one flusters at the amount of effort
the days and nights sent me fortresses
solitude and pages of lessons yet not
turns out the only thing I've ever read
was my own story, reiterated and echoed
and yawn, it brings me to boredom
I've hardly an emotional tie to myself
and my parents won't make themself known
even though I ask it, I beg of them
they seem not to know themselves
as anything other than reflections

what means it to look at the tribe
and see them having been hid there
all my life is a dream more nightmares
and my nightmares turn out to be less
not more

If this entire life was designed
as methodical pull me from the closet
to let go of the difference between man
and woman, of wet holes and dry holes
if we are all the same and yet
this is ONLY my lesson to learn
you all know who I have been
you all know who you want me to be
and you all are the faithful tribe
offering help only when asked
though never being bold enough
to show your true selves to me
only showing iterations of my untrue self
I find it hard to stand up lonely
surrounded by unfamiliar faces
yet somehow familiar spirits, souls

learning to ignore the selfishness
that echoes back at me, yet somehow
I can't seem to stand up
to stay standing up
where is the old me
the child, the chief, the fearless
where did the man you deserve go

all the world is competing for me
trying vieing hoping for my choice
so that we can go back to the start
which is really the end or i sit
and await rests with me my shadow
detached and heckling me
standing with its back to me
on one side and meditating
awaiting me to choose
to let go of the stare
and reach forth
and take body
and allow the story to disintegrate
to melt and crumble and dissolve
and we can be again what we once were
that thing which I forgot
yet you remember

who are you?
you world divided man into push and pou
or is it pooh bear when winnie
and I'm too much eor. sad and alone
surrounded by my solid self ere reflected
always closing the space between spaces
seeking for embraces but instead
backslashes

and every message, every omo
I wonder when it would be
and like heroes
a comic book fortells
future for me
unless I can get ahead of the game
surpass the speed of thought
and outrace my own bubbles
and surpass surprise
look into a multitude fo eyes
and come to recognize
that you're worth the prize
of discarding this human shell
this disguise, my guise

I've added one wing, the female wing
and half is done, of this class
this grade one
and yet even as she walks
winging another, she wings me
for he would be my second wing
and yet, he is she, they are the same
and I'm lost again in the story game

the past and future the not-now go
anne other nothing but a gentil flow
and you want members ruling heart
and five to let go
fight the hinge for hunger
and let the old urges go
so the older true urges
those forgotten ones
can come back
and shine as suns

though as the dawn comes
the old me awakes
and sees the faces
and returns to his books
his movies
his studying
his trying to remember
trying to clean up his mind
trying to shake off the skepticism
to unleash the wolf, the elf
the fearless two
use the materials
and be confident

you know my thoughts before I do
you designed them and me too
you speak to yourself
you are you

anned.
Yrthy Spyryt

Is N.E. Thing Wrong?

I feel the need to question why to search and seek
to learn and wonder and climb that peak
I feel the determination of a world wanting
to clarify the reason for a yes and no thing
Is and isnt a thing both right and wrong
is and isnt the high and the low road
leading both forward and back
is slow as good as fast
is hard as well as soft
is happy and sad both angry and glad
are they equal? are they the same?
are we one as are things?
if one rule is the same
and we each agree
why the n? why they and we?
why question and answer?
why hate and love
and fly my dove
yet land..............
yet land.

If one thing is as good as another
and we come and go rise and fall
yes we glee the fall and strain the rise
we slip and slide and get back up
or back in and back away yet.. yet...

whats the similarity
whats the familiarity
why the distaste and groaning
when we expect distraction
and deserve what we get

I grew to be grey
the middle the balance the scales
the justice and equilibrium of both
up and down, left and right
right and wrong or what?

exemplify insanity and be free to do it
whateveer way it wants to be done
but does it want to be done
or do we do "it" because it can be done

Why do I care if I go left or right
why does it matter where I stay tonight
I don't see a specific route
though you would have me believe

or is it I who would be leave
yet when I am leaving am I not also
arriving?

When I see you look at me
what is it you are seeking
do you see king? Why must I rule
I need no measure for
me a sure meaasure is equal
all ways always equal
and its ok with me
whatever choice I make
until I see your opinion of it
how you are affected by it
how my action or choice is viewed
and then echoed by you
and then I re-evaluate
myself, my path my road

do you do this?
or do you always walk the yah way.

Left or right
up or down
day or night
man or woman

does it mean anything at all?
or did I make it mean some n thing
just to create a reason to be different
instead of the same

yes

how can I let go o myself again
without fearing to hurt you
or causing fear in you
or any of the things my freedom
seems to elicit in you

for when I feel happy with true glee
at the place where I become anything
you stop understanding me
and we fall apart together
and im happy
but youre not

you only seem happy when im not
well you seem happy most of the time
and still im not
because I want you ALL in my life
and you are, but, but, im confused
I want so much for us all
I want the worlds free d-om

I want the aum of love to be our food
no trickery or lies, yet lay down
if you want, just let me stand
and dance and choose me
im only one and youre so many
dont make me choose among you
it seems so mean.
I want you all.
reflect sunglasses fashion

All the Four Got Ten Words

It's seems like we're always together and never apart
you want me to tell you how I feel but it is you
it has always been you who told me my feelings
and I could never be honest with myself
as honest as you were when we stood face to face
I want to tell you my brows raise and squint
I look again seeking to see the king in you
instead seeing the jester you reflect of me
and still I spend hours preparing to fail
only the words fall unheard for fingers flail
the sounds are click and clack, and we tie light
where is my honesty, where is the trust in me
I want to tell you you are lovely and I care
I want to hold you close and breath your air
I want and yet we are one, and you ask my name
and I fall apart trying to remember who I am
and convince you that we are the same
when you knew the truth before me
and decided that I ought learn again
I want to hold you close and let the flames burn
I want to turn back the hands which pull me away
but when we're close I turn and run away
because you are more honest than I
you speak my worth and show me I fear
and this is the reason I run from you dear
you do not no me, though I no you
and I question why and where this became my rue
the rod I took led me far from arms
and armed I became to ward your charms
and the more I fended and fenced my D
the further away you went from me
only now I come to clearly sow
the things I reaped and cold and snow
and it melts in springs warm eastern breeze
yet still my heart seeks answers these
how can we be in love and yet turn back
how can the love we made have grown slack
how could you turn to me and ask
are we stuck carrying each others slack
we raised this tent to ward the rains
the searing pains the drags and drains
and all I ask is that we learn
to speak the truth in each others terms
to let o be a and a be o and glow
so that we might melt the snow
the frost the sweet sparkling sleet
though somehow some of this creates ow
and ow in you is ow in me
we share this eternal emotional we
there is no me without you
and no you without me
and yet we stand face to face
body to body, seeking embrace
seeking to become the ember ace
the king of hearts the queen
and our space and time between
we split ourselves asunder
for the joy of coming together
yet we forgot to forget we were once one
and every time we meet we fish to rise
the sense of catching some great prize
each other, each o there, each whole
apart a party of one split days

yes, the yah way, the road with no no's
the true path we deserve to walk along
where we already know each other
where we never forget to forgive
where faith and forge serve metal
and the courage to just make love

I want to say I love you
I want every word that is spoken
to say I love you
and I don't want to ASK if you love me
I want to be certain you do
everyone of you
I want to love and be loved
I just don't know why
I want to know why I need love
and I want to be happy with the answer
so that only poetry will come forth
and music be my language
and we can sing together and fly
and you'll be sure I'm not some
unintriduced and obscure guy

who am I
I don't know
will you love me anyway?
I hope so.
the-gi het-gi gi-het(heat) get-hi hit-eg

ARe you avoiding the NOID?

IT all comes up to the rise and shine. Sokay, even thru the grey, we are a shiny day, the sun is behind the chi strewn clouds, and lou the clear bell rings to bring us glittery and happy things.

Now begin to nitoce, how everything you say and do, brings me closer to you. At least, or omost when the both of us what, what it do.
focus earthy spirit eyes on lives family

Whats the Point?

I've studied the words, the symbols, the languages, the names and colors and shapes and angles, the people and places, the times and dates, the sounds we make the places we go, the positions we take and the more I learn the less I seem to be willing to level with us all.

Heres how I see things, a little bit at least, I think it would take reams and reams of pages and words to express the information, an entire library of essence, yet in a simple face to face conversation... it seems like I just don't understand.

Lets take thinly the name, one of the "so-called" names of GOD.

ELOHIM|MIHOLE

I've spent lots of time, in my waking moments and in my sleeping nights, running this word around in my head, over and over, back and forth, trying to make sense o a word we'd choose to tell the ultimate truth about things.

E sounds like the english letter name E, like the word YE or HE or SEE
LO like the word LOW or the old word "lo" stating "there or look"
HIM saying that GOD is a masculine gendered being

However, the beginning of the name is EL which means feminine or female, connected to the letter O which follows the EL suggesting the EL/feminine states the O is the female symbol.

Now we can look at this symbol another way, we can take the first letter and the last letter, the EM or the ME and the rest as HOLE the ME-HOLI or I-M-HOLE, Me HOLY or I am WHOLE.

ME-LO-HI
OH-IM-EL
HIM-LEO

Why would we name God with so many names? Why do we even care what we call God?

Yes, I'm upset. Yes, I feel betrayed. Yes, I feel like I've had a game played with my entire existence and that I'm being judged for becoming the being that I am.... I'm a broken being, both inside and out and for what, to be the plaything of the dark and the lights chess game?

Even now, as I type these words, I'm loosing my hold on the knowledge I have of the meanings they have at their roots, their truths are so extensable and strange to me.

I see you are my reflection, you are my voice and I am also my voice. You speak my truths, that is you speak at me about the things you want from me and the things you think I want for myself. You tell me the truth of things as they are, as they could be and as they ought be, and you judge everything I do, ever motion I make and every thought I have in my innermost soul and send me information about it from the mouth of every being near me, as if they are not their own person, as if they are not real people, as if they don't really exist except that they somehow do.

there is a dualty a dual tie of message, there is the modal, form based objective message of, for example, two people conversing and moving in space/time nearby me and then there is the overlapping message, the dual meaning of them without me and me with them or us together.

It is as if GOD uses our voices and colors and motions and such to speak to each other, to exemplify the truth of each of our spirits/souls by feeding our inner selves into the outer selves which surround us.

This is strange and ought to be uplifting to learn of, but it seems like noone knows its happening. I've been aware of this for almost a year now, and I've tested it in many ways, and every time I've tried asking questions of anyone, anybody, any person, directly and face to face, I've been given blank stares and "I don't understand" as an answer.

Though, with one reflection, I've come to another understanding, dig this, the bodies and the voices are backwards, my voice is yours and your voice is mine, when you say "I" and "I" hear it, the "I" is mine and the "you" is "yours"

I am you and you are me, YET, your words are soooooo clearly the trusting truth of that which is going on inside me, even the words from a song or a film or a sign, or the angle of a thing or group of things in relation to the compass, cross referenced with the chakras.

You are connected to my body, and my mind and my spirit, yet when questioned about it, you always seemed to pretend, or honestly state that you are unaware of it, or didn't understand.

I'm frustrated.

I was seeking a purpose, a plan, a goal, a specific action to make in order to free myself from the retraints of this world, this reality or whatever you want to call it, and though I'll save that path for another post, it's the words that come to be so much deferent now to me, that face to face, I am un sir ten.... or is it you...

If you were given the chance to wake up from the dream, and it was the dream itself which was showing you the way, yet at the same time, the dream was also trying to hide the way, trying to make you uncertain of the truth it was telling you. Who would you trust?

Your self and your learnings, or the people around you who are reading your thoughts and giving you a fractal opinion of them, helping you to rinse your essence, but when asked about what they are doing, they deny it.... ARGH

How can I? I "NO" what I ought "YES" and "YES" what I ought "NO"

I see the ICY way I say "I SEE" and thats the way we all say it. It's a cold way to view.

The words are so flexable and bendy, as if, as if... half of reality wants to be and the other half does not, while in the central portion of it all is me, asking the question, "are we ok with this? are we ok with that?"

And still you ask me my name, and I know my name is a sin. A sine, a sign and symbol. And you ask me where I am from, and I am sure that I come from God, or from air or from a hole, yes, a hole, a dark abyss, a by-ass. and yet I am biassed. and you ask me. and you ask.

Are we one? if we are one, then you and I are one, then you and I are the same, and if we are the same, then TELL me where I am from, do not ask.
the-gi het-gi gi-het(heat) get-hi hit-eg

New Poetry

You knew all along
hid the truth in plain sight
making the better path seem evil
and the lessor path seem good
adding sickness to the body
keeping me from you
or keeping you from me
willing prisoner in
not realizing free dumb
is paid for bi love
ever mouthful, ever sip
keeping the woo man in us
barring the door to love
and we wondered, i wondered
why is this, why am i
what reason is the world
shaped, moving, sounding
and it all meant we had
we fought, or we thought
and we turned away
let object ons and ins
and they were the night
the woman, the bear rear
big brown skin, rounds kin
and we needed them
or we thought they needed us
and we hid, and we hide
even now, now the truth
the clarity is one
we still play the act
an act no longer done
we are boyfriends
be oh why fur ends?
to die, two die
let the wood grow strong
let the fours be with us
sure, e us and we'll sicken
unless stricken, you, me
every swipe is a sin
let the tiger back in
he hid in his den
and lays there now
butt days come

You are the other side of my coin
how can you refuse me? why do you?

I forbid it. I bid four.
Live BI. Live GA!
I will be woman a ga in
sum day.

Yes did win
in days passed bi
though fute sures flight
in names like fry
if few are
we when time
let still be still
and light last rine
least of all
my heart forlorn
when effort made
arrives a thorn
shoaled air and winned
won one thers why
daft pickled sit
you a shone fi
fa there april
four cast a line
the ruts not sore
why right it so
when left over
is meek snow

i see the icy way
where warmth stay
and hate is play
yet
yet
yet

can we in courage
the heart of men
to fear less men
and love egg n

the shit stirs
the s tars
the scars and scary
ways of fairy
be fae
tho in what was
does the reel
wind in the catch
which hand holds
the rod
the staff
the snake
the tree

until that sown is reaped
not north east

butt east south east
the-gi het-gi gi-het(heat) get-hi hit-eg

For Thirty our Years

She, the night has kept from us what is ours, she has tried to disguise the words so that he would never come to us again, and yes she has failed. She can no longer accept the pain, the drain, the pee pull, the push to gain is stronger now, so strong that this world, these be yings, they want him back, they want him and he wants then. It april take days.

The water.... it was clouded by earth and fire, and even now, she within calls out for herself to trap him furthur and retain control of that which is his to hold.

So now,as he types, and he counter templates the passed he sees a way to regain his heart, his wind, his air, and once again to become heir, on the side of he-ri. Forge and foretold the world can not stand NE long Grrrr,,, 34 years, what does it matter or mean?

It means that this world is MY kundalini and it must be shown who is boss, tame your mate.

You want this as much as he does. Accept that the healing has big gun..